So Mark, what are the Arabs like?

I’ve always been a people person, and love to watch them and see what they do – we are fascinating! So this is an important question: what are the people like in Saudi Arabia?

First, they are not all Arabs. The people working and living here are from all over the globe. I’ve met people from India, Pakistan, Bangladesh, the Philippines, Canada, Australia, Great Britain, Japan, Poland, Norway, Mexico, and of course one or two of us from the States.

The religious requirements in Saudi Arabia are explicit and strict for behavior between men and women. Two men can walk down the sidewalk holding hands, heads leaned in close for conversation, and give each other a hug and kiss when they part.  If a man and a woman were observed by the religious police doing this, they may be stoned to death. If they are married or related, they may only be beaten. No holding hands, no kissing, no contact in public. The Quran makes this all very clear, but I’m not sure why. I have it on my iPad, and will read it while I’m here (I’ve always wanted to, and a good traveler does his best to understand his host culture) but haven’t had leisure time to read anything yet!

Unrelated men and women do not interact, and women do not go out alone. Restaurants and other public areas have areas for men, and areas for families. The family area will accommodate men with families, or any single or unaccompanied women.

The Muslim culture seems to have a serious love/hate relationship with women. That may not be the right term for it, but it is what comes to mind. On one hand the women are honored, revered, and protected – I do believe that is the root motivation for this cultural behavior. On the other hand, this behavior makes the women totally, completely, absolutely subservient to men. They cannot drive, they cannot go out alone, they cannot be in the company of or spoken to by a man who is not family or husband, they must be covered when in public (some are veiled, some not, all wear an abiyah, a long black robe that covers them from shoulder to feet), and she shouldn’t make eye contact with a man not her family or husband.

Western women are free of many of these “protections,” but are regularly hassled by the religious police, the Mutaween, for not covering up properly or for being alone. I’ve met some women who have been here for up to 20 years and they love it, but I don’t think I would choose to tolerate such restrictions for very long. 

But I’ve gotten off track – I started to talk about people. I think the people here are pretty much exactly the same as the people at home, the ones in Europe, Asia, America, etc. This morning at breakfast (my hotel has a nice buffet) I saw a lovely Japanese couple at a nearby table. One of them always had a napkin in hand, and occasionally one would pass it to the other with a surreptitious glance and a quick squeeze of their fingertips. So clever and private, and so sweet.

A group of Arab boys came in for breakfast wearing jeans and shirts with sport logos and big bright graphics, chatting and playing and teasing and if it weren’t for the language it could be an American junior high school team dropping into Hardees for breakfast. There was the kid who was slimmer and smaller and quieter than the others, there was one who was nearly twice the size in height and weight of the others, there was one who was obviously the leader of the group, and then the rest were just average looking teenagers acting like any group of teenagers.

An Arab family came and went through the buffet. Two boys and two girls in western-style clothes, the little girls in pigtails (adorable!), the boys in shorts and t-shirts. The father in a thobe (the long white robe Arab men typically wear) and the mother in black abayah and face veil. The boys went tearing around to see what foods were there, the father ignoring the boys, and the mother gesturing and (apparently) directing the father in no uncertain terms to get those boys under control, the father grudgingly doing so and looking put out for his troubles. All so typical! I saw the boys pestering each other, poking and teasing and laughing, and saw the girls whispering about the boys, teasing them, and laughing. 

All totally normal human behavior wrapped up in a new environment. Just one more reminder that under the skin we are all the same. Wherever we live, however we dress, whatever our customs and our skin color, we are all brothers and sisters walking the same dirt and breathing the same air.

The people here are all sizes and shapes, just like anywhere else. If you have a stereotype of Arabs as tall and thin, you’d be wrong. They are that; they are also short and slight, tall and big and strong like a football player, short and stout and rotund, some just jumbo sized like me. Too much American influence on diet, probably! For the most part, just like at home, 6-foot-tall Mark is taller than most men here. The women vary in height, as you would expect, otherwise they are exactly the same: invisible sheathed in a shapeless black bag and veil.

Although I must point out that some of those robes are what one might term fashionable, if seen in a difference setting. You are not supposed to look at Saudi women, and absolutely shouldn’t make eye contact, and I’ve done pretty well at shorting out my lifelong habit of closely looking at everyone I see, male and female, to respect the culture here. But the other day as I was walking out of work my glance crossed what I would guess to be a woman in her early 30s (she wasn’t veiled, but otherwise was covered from head to foot).  

She was pretty, and her robe was beautiful! It was trimmed in some kind of lace or edging that was a lighter, kind of translucent shimmery material that was a lighter shade of black, and there were vertical rows, about six inches apart around her garment, of some kind of beading that sparkled when the sun hit it. It was less of a bag or cape and more of a fitted garment. Seriously, this looked like it should be on a red carpet somewhere. I should point out that I didn’t look or stare at her, just took this in at a glance as I looked across the crowd of people walking, and used my pilot/Jedi skills to replay it after. Everybody can do that, right? :)

Can’t go with a photo, so here are a couple of views of my hotel – as you can see it has age, glamour, and a few scratches.  It’s not bad, I’ve been in much worse, and it certainly has some advantages. I’ll probably be here another week, then move on camp.